Real Me

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-SvTOtgPYqk&feature=autoshare

I' missed the day that i feel alive, that i can feel myself & my own soul. Believe in my step.
Never had any doubt. I know i can do better. But the world change. People change.
People that we adore so much are long gone. I want to go back. I wanna dig in... the real me are buried deep down. I wanna save it. This time is for REAL. I don't wanna give up on something that bring myself the light at first place. For people that drag me down & leave me hanging, Thank you for being in my life. It makes me realize that i still here, fighting, moving forward without you.

Dear my beloved Daddy,
I miss you so much. I pray that you happy with God who loves you the most.

There is no pain, no sadness anymore.

The faith in Me

What can i say? I've losing myself lately. For what ive done, for what i say. Its hurt me and people around me. I realize ive lost my faith. In everything i did. This song says it all. I wanna start new in my life. It is became so clear, im not belong to anyplace that i though i'll fit in. Im sorry all, im sorry to myself for letting these to happen. So, my journey of blogging again begin. Its is me, the real me.. deep in myself i always keep asking someone to love and care. But me, myself do not love my own body & soul. God, show me, show me im worth to you..

The Day I Found GOD

Well.. it doesn't make sense at all. The feeling in love, lust, big dream together & attitude & throughout of this things. I'm gone insane! But how much this life put me into this temptation of betrayal, hates, egos & ignorance. I have found GOD. It doesn't make sense but is true!

How I lose myself by this MEN love, struggling, denying, blind by word of promise. I've fall into deep darkness which I have to fight the demon in me.

I've been save by one & only GOD. Who loves

me more. Who appreciate me a lot. I do blame myself and commited big sins & I wanna commit suicide but God Grace, I pray & left all my pain away and surrender. I give all my heart & soul to our GOD! How blessed my life now. I know it's hard to forgive someone but I try not think again about the past, I just say " I leave it all to you my Lord". It's the sweetest love that I ever taste!

I do not regret. I'm happy that I found you Jesus Christ. 🙏🏻🙏🏻😇

A Life i had is like a puzzle. I have collected them piece by piece. Try to match it. I'am almost done and i can see some other picture clear but not complete. It make sense but without other puzzle that when missing, i feel incomplete. So, and that is how i describe my feeling & my life.

My family. How much i love them the most. As much i love God. I really grateful they still with me
& needs me. I know im the elders daughter. They count on me the most. The point is, no matter how
hard your life is, there is no excuse for not been there for them. Even though you hate them, i still love them.

I start to think what am i gonna do with my life? Instated of working so hard to get a paycheck that is less than your expenses? Build my dream? Studio? Well,, its too sudden but im in love, Seriously, YES I AM,